Your children are the most important part of your divorce or custody case. Making sure that they get through the process with as little trauma as possible will be a priority to us.
Children don’t really care who has “custody.” To a child, one parent is still Mom and the other parent in still Dad. The word custody may be on a piece of paper that is put away in a drawer, but it is not the most important thing to consider. What is important is each parent’s relationship with his or her child. This is a relationship that means you will be participating in raising your child and will establish a closeness that will carry on into the future after your child is grown.
The other parent is not going away. That parent will still be participating in raising your children with you in most cases. Even after your children are grown, you will still run into that parent at weddings, graduations, and grandkids birthday parties. So, since your co-parent is not going away, now is the perfect time to learn how to have a civil co-parent relationship for the sake of your children.
Most counties in Oregon require that the parties complete a “Parent Education Class” before their divorce or custody case can be finalized. This class teaches parents how to get along and parent together after they are no longer a couple. Children can also attend the class to address some of their feelings about their parent’s divorce.
Most counties also offer mediation for the parents to discuss a variety of options for a parenting plan for the children. Most parent’s share time with their children in a variety of different plans. One popular plan right now includes a “home base” for the children, but significant time with the other parent. The non-residential parent has the children Thursday through Monday morning return to school one week, and Thursday to Friday morning the next week. This plan is one day less each week than 50/50. It allows the kids to have one home base and not feel like they are living out of a suitcase. But, the other parent also has significant time. Additional time would be added in the summer for vacations and holiday parenting time would also be added.
This is just one parenting plan out of many. Every family is different. Work schedules, kid’s activities, kid’s ages, distance between the parents and a variety of other factors need to be taken in to account to determine the best parenting plan for your family. We always keep the kids as the highest priority in our cases, and we will work together with you to resolve this most important issue.